Adults Only Wedding Receptions

June 7th, 2010

Is your vision of the perfect wedding an elegant soiree with everyone dressed to the nines in tuxedos and cocktail dresses and dazzling wedding jewelry while sipping sophisticated drinks? If so, a bunch of children running around might not fit in with your idea of the perfect reception. Pulling off an adults-only wedding reception without angering a lot of your guests can be tricky; this is how to do it with grace.

When you decide to have a child-free wedding, it is important to be absolutely equitable about it. Set a cut off age, like 16 or 18, and stick to it across the board. While some people may not like it, at least if you are fair, they have no legitimate complaint. The real drama arises when the bride and groom start making exceptions for individual children. Then the parents of the kids who were excluded will have real reason to feel offended.

The easiest way to have an adults-only wedding is to plan an evening event. When the ceremony does not start until 6pm and the main meal won’t be served until 8 or 9 o’clock at night, it is pretty plain to see that this is not an event where kids belong. Bill it as chance for the parents to get all dressed up in their best clothing and wedding jewelry and enjoy a date night without their children. Then make it a party they won’t soon forget, with great food and drinks, sophisticated music, and elegant decor.

Many brides wonder if it is acceptable to write “Adults only reception” on their wedding invitations. The answer is that it is not polite to do so. The proper thing to do is to very clearly address the invitation to the guests whom you want to attend by name. Anyone not named on the invitation is not invited. To make it even more clear that extra people are not to be brought along, consider making response cards which are customized with the names of the individuals with a space to check “will attend” or “unable to attend”.

In the end, there will always be some guests who decide not to attend an adults-only wedding, either because they are irritated or because they could not find appropriate child care. However, if you handle the whole thing gracefully, those no-shows will be few and far between, and you will be able to have exactly the sophisticated wedding reception which you envisioned.

Adults Only Wedding Receptions

July 6th, 2009

Although children can be a lot of fun at a wedding, there are plenty of couples who decide to have adults only wedding receptions. There can be many reasons why you might choose to go this route, from financial to space to personal preference. These are some of the things to take into consideration when you are deciding whether or not to have kids at your wedding reception.

Generally, the main reason that a bride and groom opt for an adults only reception is not about cost, but about the type of event that they are hoping to have. Time of day is often a factor. For instance, perhaps your vision has always been a black tie wedding, so that the bride can really dress to the nines in a fancy wedding gown with custom bridal jewelry. Black tie wedding ceremonies always start at six in the evening or later, which would make for a very late reception. This is one of the strongest indicators that it is not an appropriate event for children. (Unless you don’t mind having some very grumpy overtired little ones at your reception.)

Sometimes it is less the time of day and more the flavor of the party that would call for an adults only reception. If you are planning to have a swanky cocktail party, maybe children running around under foot does not match up with your vision of a sophisticated and elegant reception. Perhaps you picture yourself hanging out in a cool custom lounge in your hip bridal gown and trendy jewelry; the pitter-patter of little feet might not really match up with this scenario.

Once the decision is made to have an adults only reception for your wedding, there will be a few things to keep in mind. The first one is how to make sure that it is perfectly clear to your guests that the wedding invitation does not extend to their offspring. The tricky part is to achieve this without offending anybody. You should also keep in mind that no matter how tactfully you handle the situation, there will be some guests who are offended anyway, and there may also be some families who will make the choice not to attend a wedding if they cannot bring their children. This is unfortunate, but there is really not much that the bride and groom can do about it, other than be as gracious as possible.

In certain instances, an adults only wedding reception is the perfect answer. This type of reception definitely lends itself to being more formal and more elegant. If that is your style, than an adults only reception may be right for you.