A Quiz for Grooms

See how much you already know and what more you need to learn with this fun quiz for grooms…

1. During the wedding ceremony, when does the groom walk down the aisle? Is it:

   a. right before the bride

   b. immediately following the bride

   c. arm in arm with the bride

2. What parts of a wedding is the groom traditionally responsible for financing?

   a. the bride’s wedding jewelry, her bouquet, and the honeymoon

   b. all of the flowers and the band

   c. nothing

3. True or false: the groom should give his attendants groomsmen gifts to thank them for being in the wedding?

4. Which is more formal, black tie or white tie?

5. What is the cost of the average American wedding?

   a. $8,000

   b. $18,000

   c. $28,000

Answers:

1. Sorry guys, this was a trick question right off the bat! The correct answer is none of the above. The groom and the groomsmen do not walk down the aisle during the processional at all. They make their way to the altar from the side, and wait there during the processional.

2. a. The groom traditionally was responsible for the bride’s wedding jewelry (including her engagement ring, wedding band, and a gift of jewelry to be worn at the wedding), the bride’s bouquet (but not the rest of the flowers), and the honeymoon trip.
   

3. True. It is customary to show your appreciation for your attendants with nice groomsmen gifts. Classic choices include silver pocketknives, engraved flasks, and silver cufflinks.

4. White tie is the most formal, and is rarely seen these days.

5. c. The average cost of an American wedding is around $28,000, and can run considerably more in certain cities.

So how did you do? Are you a wedding planning MVP yet, or still waiting to be called up from the minor leagues? Whichever the case, if you do your best to help the bride and keep her feeling happy and relaxed, you are sure to have a terrific wedding.

Wedding Engraving

A wedding is such a special occasion that it is only natural to want to find a way to create lasting memories of it. One great idea is to have pieces engraved; you can personalize everything from the wedding bands to the bridesmaid gifts to wedding presents. Here are some ideas on the things that you can have engraved for your wedding, as well as suggestions on what to write.

If you have only one thing engraved for your wedding, it should be the wedding rings. What you actually choose to put inside will depend on the size of the ring and your personal preferences, but you can generally expect to fit around 20 letters, spaces, and characters into a wedding band. If you are lucky, your jeweler may even throw in the engraving at no charge when you purchase the rings. The most traditional thing to put in a wedding band is the couple’s initials, with the wedding date in between them (you would put the bride’s initials first in the groom’s ring, and vice versa). Of course, feel free to be as expressive as you want with your mini-message. One of the funnier inscriptions that I have seen read, “Put this ring back on!”.

Gifts of bridesmaid jewelry are another wonderful thing to have personalized with an inscription. Sterling silver bracelets or necklaces with large flat charms make a thoughtful gift when engraved with the monogram of each bridesmaid. Classic gifts like engraved bridesmaid jewelry are the perfect way to express your gratitude to your attendants.

It is not only precious metals that can be engraved. Heavy glass and crystal can be inscribed as well, which leads to some great options for both wedding presents and groomsmen gifts. For the groomsmen, nice crystal or glass beer steins with their initials make handsome gifts. If you are a guest looking for a personalized wedding gift, think about something like a beautiful crystal bowl customized with the wedding date. There is nothing better than something that has been personalized with you in mind.

Tips for the Brother of the Bride

If you are the brother of the bride, you may not think that you have much of a role to play in the upcoming wedding, but that is not true. There are plenty of ways in which you can participate and share in the excitement. Here are some tips on how to be a great brother of the bride.

A lot of guys are not really that “into” weddings, and unless it is your wedding, that is just fine. You may think that your sister and mom are going absolutely crazy over this whole wedding thing (especially if you are the younger, unmarried brother of the bride), and it may even be true. However, you will do yourself no favors by sharing that opinion with your sister, for whom the wedding is probably one of the biggest days of her entire life. A better tactic when your sister starts going on about the wedding is just to smile and nod while she talks; she may not even notice that your eyes have glazed over!

Most brothers of the bride will be asked to participate in the ceremony in some way. You will probably be asked to serve as a groomsman, and your duties will be much the same as those of the rest of the groomsmen. You get to help with the bachelor party, be fitted for a tuxedo, receive one of the groomsmen gifts, attend the rehearsal and dinner afterwards, and stand up with the groom during the marriage service. Single brothers will be pleased to hear that they are also responsible for escorting a pretty young bridesmaid up the aisle during the recessional.

At times the brother of the bride might end up taking on a more important role in the wedding. If their father has passed away, it would be very appropriate and touching for the bride’s brother to be the one to walk her down the aisle and give her away. It is also very nice if you give a brief toast at the reception. Keep it brief and congratulatory; you surely know all sorts of embarrassing stories about your sister, but the wedding toast is not the time to bring them up!

With a little more involvement, the bride’s brother might actually find that her wedding can be a good time. You also have the pleasure of gaining a new brother, and if you are single, meeting some attractive women (weddings often breed more weddings, you know). In the end, you might just come to discover that being the brother of the bride is not so bad after all.

“I Love You, Man”

The recent movie “I Love You, Man” is all about the trials and tribulations of a groom looking for a close enough friend to be his best man. The romantic comedy highlights a problem that many men face when they get engaged: choosing their groomsmen and best man. These are some ideas on how to deal with finding the right best man for your wedding.

Hopefully, you do not find yourself in the same position as the groom in “I Love You, Man”. That man found himself in the unfortunate position of having no male friends close enough to be his honor attendant. Hilarity ensues as he goes on a series of “man-dates”, during which he auditions guys to be his new best friend. The friend that he finally clicks with nearly destroys his relationship with the bride, though of course, it all works out happily in the end.

If you are in the position of having to decide between several friends to be your best man, well, first off, congratulations; at least you have lots of friends, unlike the groom in “I Love You, Man”. At least you will not have to go shopping for a best man. All you need to do is think carefully about each of your friends, and evaluate the pros and cons of each one as a best man.

Once you do decide on your best man and the rest of your groomsmen, you will want to find the perfect groomsmen gifts to show your appreciation. The gifts for your groomsmen can be anything that you think your friends will enjoy, but usually you will want to look for something that can be personalized. Gifts like silver cufflinks or pocketknives are popular options for groomsmen and best man presents, because they are lasting signs of your friendship.

Handsome Boutonierres

There are almost as many choices for boutonierres as there options for the bride’s bouquet. In general, the boutonierres worn by the men in the wedding party should coordinate with the rest of the flowers (sorry guys, I guess it is still all about the bride!). A nice way to tie in the lapel flowers with the bouquets and other floral displays is to choose one of the same blooms featured in the bride’s flowers to use as the boutonierre.

Usually, the boutonierre consists of a single flower, but you can also combine a few small elements to make a unique ornament. For instance, for an autumn wedding, you can wire an acorn into a spray of orange berries for a charming seasonal accent. A winter groom would look dashing sporting a small spray of pine with a few red berries and a single white flower. Just be sure to keep the boutonierres from getting too large, or the men will refuse to wear them!

Sparkle is one of the hottest trends at weddings these days, and you see that carried into the boutonierres. A simple rose can be dressed up with a string of tiny Swarovksi crystals wrapped around the stem. Or a few crystals can be wired into the center of an open flower. This is often a popular idea for the groom, and then the groomsmen will wear the same type of boutonierre without the crystal accents.

It the traditional etiquette of wedding flowers, the bride’s family pays for all of the flowers, except for the bride’s bouquet, which is sometimes a gift from the groom. These days, things are a bit looser, especially as more couples finance their own weddings. It would be nice for the bride to give the groom his boutonierre, and then the groom can give the groomsmen their boutonierres as a gift. (This is not to be confused with the main groomsmen gift, which should be something of lasting value, like silver cufflinks.)

The bouttonierre is a small detail in the grand scheme of a wedding, to be sure. However, the boutonierre is one of the few bits of flair that the groom will get to wear, so it is important. Choose a lapel accent for him that is stylish and classic, and your groom will look even more handsome on your wedding day.

Advice for Grooms

The first thing that grooms need to realize is that although the wedding day is only one day, for most women, it is the most eagerly anticipated day of her life. So although you may think that it is silly to spend so much time and money on a wedding, don’t say that to your fiancee! You might think that you are being realistic, but to a bride it will feel like you are stepping on her dreams.

Even though the bride will be the focus of the wedding, the groom can definitely be a part of the planning. Offer to help with the things that interest you, like the food, the cake, and the music. Many grooms today are getting even more involved, by really helping to craft the overall design and theme of the wedding. This can be especially nice if you have some cultural traditions that you would like to include in your wedding. So if you want to wear a kilt, by all means, speak up! Your bride will be glad to see that you have an interest in planning the wedding.

One thing that the groom must do for himself is select his best man and groomsmen. Think carefully about this. Your best man should be someone that you not only feel close to, but that you can trust with the wedding rings. For the sake of peace and harmony, try not to avoid choosing a friend for a groomsmen that you know your bride despises, especially if she thinks that he is a bad influence! Once you have picked your attendants, you will also want to give them special groomsmen gifts. Yes, you could let the bride choose the gifts for your groomsmen, but they will be more personal if you do it yourself. Even guys who hate shopping will find that they can get their groomsmen gifts taken care of quickly and painlessly, if they buy them online.

The most important thing that a groom can do, of course, is to love and support his bride. Wedding planning can be a thrilling and emotional time, and your fiancee will need your help to survive it. Just remember, the wedding will pass before you know it, and you will soon have her all back to yourself!

Matching Attendants to the Bride and Groom

Getting the men in the wedding party coordinated is really quite easy. Whatever the groom wears is what the groomsmen should wear. If the groom wears a tuxedo, his attendants will also wear tuxedos. If the groom wears a navy blazer and khakis, then the groomsmen will wear that too. Some couples think that they should dress the groom a little bit differently to make him stand out from the rest of the men, but this really is not necessary. Everyone will recognize the groom, since he will be the one standing up at the altar kissing the bride!

There may be some additional touches that you want for the men in the wedding. If they will be wearing shirts with French cuffs, a very nice wedding gift from the bride would be a pair of cufflinks. You can have them engraved with his monogram, or perhaps your wedding date. A really fun idea is a pair of locket cufflinks with a picture of the happy couple inside. The groom can use this same concept when he is looking for gifts for his groomsmen. These days, a lot of young men do not own any cufflinks, and a silver pair makes for very handsome groomsmen gifts, indeed.

The bride and her bridesmaids will not wear the same dresses, of course. You do want the style of the bridesmaid dresses to be in keeping with what the bride will be wearing though. In particular, it looks best when the attendants match the bride in the degree of formality. If the bride will be wearing a satin gown with a cathedral length train, it would look very odd for the bridesmaids to wear above the knee cocktail dresses. On the other hand, if the bride is wearing a simple linen gown for an outdoor wedding, putting the bridesmaids into long silk gowns would also be a mismatch.

The wedding party should also complement the look of the bride and groom in terms of accessories and grooming. This applies more to the hair and makeup of the ladies, but the groomsmen are not exempt. For example, if you are having a barefoot wedding on the beach, it might not matter if the best man shows up with three days worth of stubble on his face, but for a ceremony at the Ritz-Carleton, he had darn well better have a fresh shave and a haircut!

Groomsmen Gifts for the Outdoorsman

You want your groomsmen gifts to be something that your friends will really enjoy. Every time that they use it, they should remember you and your wedding fondly. Ideally, a groomsman present will be something that will last and stand the test of time. Stay away from anything too trendy or cheaply made.

If you have men in your wedding party who love to be outdoors, that could be a place to begin when thinking about their gifts. What are some of the best memories that you all have together? Is it hiking, camping, or fishing?

Or perhaps you like to spend time outside together doing something more sporty like playing in the company softball league or even just catching a football game together. These can also be great sources of inspiration.

For instance, if one of your friends loves camping, a really nice tent or high-end sleeping bag could make a terrific, if non-traditional, groomsman gift. Other ideas include monogrammed golf balls for the golf enthusiast or maybe a selection of fancy hand-tied flies for the fly fisherman.

There are lots of great choices that any man would love to receive. You can never go wrong with a silver pocket knife. Make it more special by engraving his initials on it. One of the nice things about that type of gift is that it works for guys with a broad range of interests. The practical sort will like the pocket knife because it is functional, and the more stylish guy will like its timeless good looks.

Although finding the perfect gift for your groomsmen may not be easy, it is worth putting the effort in to get the perfect thing. If you take some time to think about what they would really like, deciding on the right gift will not be so difficult, after all. And when you see how much your attendants appreciate what you selected, all of your hard work will be worth it.

A Wedding Planning Timeline

One of the best ways to prepare for your wedding is to follow a wedding timeline . That way, you will be certain that you are allowing enough time to get everything ready. These are a few of the things to keep in mind:

12 months before: Set a date, book vendors and venues, decide on bridal party

8-9 months before: Hire band, caterer, photographer, and florist. Purchase bridal gown.

6 months before: Order invitations, plan honeymoon, and find bridesmaid dresses. Purchase wedding rings.

4 months before: Order cake. Arrange rehearsal dinner and post-wedding brunch.

3 months before: Finalize menu. Choose favors. Order personalized gifts for groomsmen, bridesmaids, and flower girls.

2 months before: Mail invitations. Have bridal shower. Get playlist to band.

1 month before: Get marriage license, write vows, and get a haircut.

Final week: Pick up bridal gown, get mani/pedi, pack for honeymoon, and…get married! Congratulations!