Reasons Not to Be a Bridesmaid
It is a very big honor to be asked to participate in a friend’s wedding. In fact, being invited to be a bridesmaid is one of the things in our society that should only be turned down in very special circumstances, and even then it must be done carefully. That said, however, there are times when a woman should decline the request to be a bridesmaid in a wedding.
There are not many good reasons to decline an invitation to be an honor attendant, but there are some that are valid and socially acceptable. One of the most likely reasons is finances. It is frankly very expensive to be in a wedding, often costing as much as a couple of thousand dollars. By the time you have paid for the dress, the bridesmaid jewelry, the airfare, and the hotel, the costs can really add up!
Pregnancy is another valid excuse to opt out of being a wedding attendant. If the wedding is within a month or so of your due date, it is highly unlikely that you will feel up to standing at the altar during the ceremony. This is also one of the few times that it is acceptable to drop out of a wedding that you had agreed to be in. The bride should understand, and treat her pregnant friend as an honored guest instead of a bridesmaid.
Another reason not to be a bridesmaid is if you do not approve of the bride’s choice of husband. This can be a very difficult situation, especially if your friend was not previously aware of your feelings. There is a strong possibility that the friendship may not survive, but if you have serious concerns about your friend’s future husband, you should not be an honor attendant at their wedding. It would be highly hypocritical to do so.
Most of the time it is wonderful and exciting to take part in a friend’s wedding. On the rare occasion when this is not the case, you must find a way to extricate yourself from the situation gracefully. Your goal should be to get out of the wedding while keeping your friendship with the bride intact.
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